Why We Appreciate

Appreciating emotions doesn’t come easy, especially when it comes to the ones we deem “negative.” Think about it—the energy we put into fearing those uncomfortable feelings within us, the ones that keep us stuck, in the same wheel, same position, without finding a way to get out. 

No wonder there’s such greatness that comes with finally coming to terms with what we’re feeling. The release is so big—it opens up doors we couldn’t even see beforehand.

I think about the times I hid from my emotions, and I’m not talking about ancient history. Day after day, time after time, I chose to put my emotions on pause. Heck, even talking about emotions can sometimes be a way to hide from them. When’s the last time you looked at a list of emotions and asked yourself which ones you truly identify with? Which ones you wish you felt more often? And which ones you wish you’d never feel again?

For me, the emotions I hid the most were jealousy, resentment, and anger. The reason I felt those emotions was because I wasn’t being or doing what I thought I was supposed to. I wasn’t authentically living in my self-expression—my way of seeing life, spirituality, God, and even myself as God.

I hid because I knew I wasn’t “living it up.” I had lied to myself years ago. The betrayal began when I didn’t allow myself to forgive myself—for the thoughts I had, for believing those thoughts, and for creating a life out of alignment with my truth.

I was supposed to know better, to do better, to be better. And yet, knowing where I had come from, I held on to that energy. It felt comforting. It felt like home. It felt familiar—to my mother, and to her mother before her. Breaking those chains was exhausting for me. I told myself, Look at me: I’m feeling the hurt. I’m so intelligent and beyond what anybody else is thinking. But deep down, I knew I wasn’t fully living.

As I sit through my emotions, truly close my eyes and fully live them and then find the beauty in what I experience; I feel brand new. I feel alive and true. I feel more power, more excitement more joy and I know more is coming. In every way.

Hope this entry made you think, feel, appreciate and see things differently.

Talk soon,

With Love,

Cindy